I hope my title was an inviting one to all those horse people out there! Last Saturday morning was a cool, sunny morning. My dad was visiting and we were sitting out on our deck. I couldn't help but think of my mom. It was mornings like this that she and I were up early getting my horse loaded into the trailer to head to a horse show. She was always so game and always woke me with such gusto in those early morning hours. My belly was usually a little nervous, but she always insisted on a good healthy breakfast before we started out on our adventure. I wonder what horse shows are like in heaven?! Anyway, on to my study.
John 16:7) But very truly I tell you, it is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Advocate will not come to you; but if I go, I will send Him to you.
In my own life Satan has a few areas that he knows are my weaknesses. I am going to share something personal with you. I can be a pessimist. I REALLY battle this now! A fancy word for pessimist is a realist. Being a realist sounds much better. I just see things for what they really are! What is the harm there?! Here is the problem with that ideology. My senses are human. They are faulty. Just because I don't see something happening or feel it doesn't mean it isn't happening. So I am voicing a perspective on only what my human senses can attain. God moves beyond me senses and his promises transcend anything I can humanly feel.
I am a pessimist, uh I mean realist, because I like to be safe. If I anticipate a negative outcome I won't be disappointed. If I don't put myself out there chances are I won't be let down. Realist are not dreamers or maybe they do dream, but are too afraid to take aim at the star and shoot.
I am going to give you an example of a time when I played it safe. The last year I showed Sox I had a chance to qualify for the AQHA World Championship Show. I had brought Sox out of retirement to show one last season. For years I had wanted to show him at the All American Quarter Horse Congress and I decided it was now or never which, by the way, was a huge risk for Miss Safe Anna. So after a few months of showing we learned there was a chance I could attain enough points to qualify. We had hauled Sox to a show in Pennsylvania than had him hauled back to a show in Ohio. The plan was for me to travel back to the Ohio show in a few days. The Ohio show historically had very strong over fence numbers meaning that if I had solid rounds and the judges liked me I could win a lot of points. Some unforeseen adversity arose and showing would have been inconvenient so I went to the show grounds to pick Sox up and bring him home. On the drive home I remember feeling relieved. Why? Because I don't like risks. I would have really put myself (and Sox) out there. I could have spent a lot of money and gotten my hopes up and not gotten those hard to attain perfect rounds or landed judges that hated forward moving sorrel Working Hunter horses! The pessimistic side of me just knew those two scenarios would take place. That was 11 years ago and I still think about it and often think what could have been. I believe some of the most important life lessons happened for me on the back of a horse.
I believe God doesn't want us playing it safe in our walk with Him. For me taking risks means living out my faith. It means trusting Him. It means doing something that makes me uncomfortable. He has called His children to be brave and courageous.
A few days ago I decided to make an extremely bold move. God had allowed a series of events to occur that I could not ignore. I asked Him a simple question, should I stay put or should I go? He said, "go." Don't worry I am not leaving Dave! When He said "go" I got scared and began to doubt what I heard. That was not the safe thing to do and it probably wouldn't work out anyway, right?! I have told that pessimistic devil on my shoulder to shut up about 100 times since then and I will continue to do so.
How does our key verse factor into my study? I desperately need help to not be a pessimist. The experiences I have had with my health have made being negative that much easier. The leap of faith that I feel called to take goes against everything I feel. Remember what I said before? Feelings aren't necessarily based on truth. I am choosing to do what God is leading me to do regardless of what has not worked in my past.
I cannot change my thinking on my own. Satan will continue to try and break me down. The Advocate is whom I need. He is my Counselor, Helper, Comforter, Intercessor, Strengthener, and Standby. I must be honest with Him and admit my weaknesses. I have told Him. "God, the thought of taking this leap pretty much makes me wanna puke...or curl into a ball. I NEED YOUR HELP." He keeps sending reassurance and is helping me to take it minute by minute. I promise He will do the same for you if you admit your weakness and rely solely on Him.
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