Romans 12:6-8) We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.
I don't know exactly how spiritual gifts work, but I do know that they are truly a gift from God. Romans 12:6 says they are. He graces us with His character which manifests in spiritual gifts. Like I said I don't know all there is to know about spiritual gifts, but I do think can people have multiple gifts. I believe we are born with the ability to practice these gifts, but because of the Fall in Eden we are selfish by nature. When we are born again in the Spirit He takes over and controls those gifts and perfects them in us. Gifts may arise that we never knew were there due to our relationship with Jesus Christ deepening. I know that has been true in my own life.
No one gets through this life unscathed. John 16:33 promises we will have trouble in this world. I told my friend yesterday that the trials in life can do one of two things to us. On one hand the trials can make us angry, bitter, foolish, and selfish. On the other hand the trials can make us brave, courageous, bold, and passionate, and selfless. One choice can paralyze us and render us ineffective for Christ. The other choice can put us in a position to refine our gifts and to use them to further God's Kingdom. The choice is ours. In my life I had no idea what my gifts were until I faced some really hard times.
I want to focus on the gift of encouragement right now. I think it is interesting that the Greek translation for the word encourage (exhort) is paracletos (paraclete) which means to call to one's side. I like that. Other definitions of encourage are: to inspire with courage, to stimulate by assistance, build up confidence, or promote. I will tell you about my dear friend at the beginning of this entry. She is just straight up encouraging. It appears to come so easily to her. I hope I have helped her realize God created this ability in her. She is a vessel for His encouragement. Jesus encouraged when He walked this earth and we are called to encourage one another. I will also talk about my dad. He encourages those around him with his wisdom on life.
I said earlier that our life circumstances and trials can either build up our gifts or minimize them. I can think of some people in my life that have used their trials to encourage others. My Dad is perfect example of this. Encouragement can happen in different ways. My dad encouraged me as we journeyed along the path of Mom's decline from cancer. At the time I didn't realize how his encouragement was working. It wasn't obvious, but is now.
1. My dad, Dan. I have gotten to know my dad much more over the last five years. I was always a daddy's girl and very close to my dad, but my mom was the more dominant personality in my life. It wasn't until my mom was diagnosed with cancer that I really, really got to know my dad as an adult. She was always the social director of the family. She mostly planned what went on. My dad was more the silent force. Anyone that knows him knows he is a man of few words, but his few words are very meaningful and purposeful. My mom's mental capabilities were GREATLY affected by the two large tumors in her head. She could no longer handle the roles she used to carry. Dad took over like any real man would do. He was her liaison. Mom also became very introverted the longer her disease progressed. For any of you that know her you know she is not naturally an introvert! Dad simply handled not only his affairs, but now hers also. He helped plan holiday get-togethers and family camping trips and outings. When I would go to visit them Mom would sleep most of the time so Dad and I just had more time together to banter about life and to contemplate my relationship with Mom that at times was very troubled. We just had more time together because I was no longer going shopping with mom or going to horse shows. We would just sit, watch Eli run around, and chat.
As hard as it was for Christy and I to watch Mom slowly die he watched his life mate truly lose her mind. I don't use that term lightly. The cancer slowly destroyed her mind. Mom would often act irrationally and say hurtful things and Dad always reminded me that it was the cancer. He encouraged me to be patient. Personality wise she was no longer the woman I had known for 31 years. He encouraged me (and Christy) to give her the benefit of the doubt and to remember the battle that was going on physically in her body. This encouragement was incredible. I mentioned earlier that Mom and I had our share of conflict in our relationship especially the last seven years of her life. I remember I had flown home quickly in January after getting word that Mom had a bad seizure and was in the hospital. Dad had been told there was no longer anything the doctors could do for Mom. He was sent home with medication for her to "keep her comfortable." I remember Dad and I sitting and talking one night. He said, "Anna, if there is anything you need to deal with before your mom dies you need to do that." No one knew how long she had left, but Dad's gut said it wasn't long and his wisdom knew once she was gone the dynamic for dealing with issues would be different. I had many things on my heart that I wanted to talk to Mom about, but I knew her mental capacity would not allow us to really dig into some tough issues. I simply had to forgive her for hurts...bottom line and end of story. I had to let it all go. I can never thank him enough for encouraging me to do this. He has also encouraged me to remember the mom I knew before cancer ravaged her body. I love him for this.
True encouragement is not saying what someone wants to hear, but also saying what they need to hear. His encouragement came in practical ways. It came at a time when we were all struggling to handle a horrid situation. He wasn't encouraging me to do the easy things, but the RIGHT things. I believe Biblical encouragement involves building someone up in Christ. It is encouraging them to reach beyond themselves and match their actions with Christ's actions. It is building up their confidence to be more than they thought they could be or to help hold on to hope when they are out of strength.
I have a dear friend that is extraordinary at encouragement. Through some very difficult times she has been one of my biggest cheerleaders behind my husband, dad, and sister. The best part about her is that you know she is being sincere. She's not just saying things she thinks you want to hear...she means what she says. She truly has brought me out of rotten moods. Dave is my biggest fan, but he can't fill every role to me. Sometimes a girl needs another girl, ya know?!
I'll shortly explain how she encourages me in ways completely different than my dad did in the case of losing my mom. I see her basically every day because we are both gym rats. She is one of those people that when she asks how you are doing she really wants to know. I know! How crazy is that?! She encourages me daily to be honest with her about how I'm feeling so we can deal with it...together. She also knows when I'm not being honest! As you know I have some serious hormone issues (that are improving by the way!) which can wreak havoc on essentially every aspect of my life. I know I'm safe to tell her the truth. She always calls me to her side so we can bear the burden together. When I feel emotional she helps talk through the situation in practical terms. She is such a positive influence on my life. She truly has a special gift from the Lord.
Stay tuned for the next entry to read more about how people I know are following Jesus' example and are practicing the gift of encouragement. My goal is at the end you will see how all of us can reach out to another soul and offer a helping hand, a kind word, and inspiration to become more than we thought we could be. No matter our trial or our walk of life we can help carry another's burden.
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