Hey everyone! I hope you all had a peaceful Christmas. We missed our families in Ohio, but enjoyed our southern holiday also. It was been outstanding having Dave home for close to two weeks. Our vacation at home has been wonderful. The only downside has been the fact that poor, little Eli has had the flu. When I say the flu I mean THE FLU. He has been soooooo incredibly sick. Keeping a five year old on the couch for five days has not been easy! So on to the point of my blog entry.
Luke 8:39) Return home and tell how much God has done for you." So the man went away and
told all over town how much Jesus had done for him.
So this is what I shall do now. Shall? For some reason Eli has been using this word. "Shall we play Wii?" "What shall we do now, mom?" Anywho. Like many of you I think if I declare something that has happened that is good out loud there is a chance I will like jinx it or something. There are also some people that constantly talk about all the good things that happen in their lives. Let's admit it...we often want to smack those people! :-) So there is something really good that I have experienced the last few months...I bet your really curious now. I don't mean good as in we had a good Christmas, I had a good run the other day, etc. I mean good as in good like you can't even believe it happened, someone pinch me, an utter miracle, I have been pleading to God for this for years and years and years.
S-L-E-E-P. For those of you who sleep well on a regular basis you don't get the magnitude of never sleeping well. I have been plagued with insomnia for longer than I can remember. I did everything the experts said to do. Our bedroom was cold, the bed was perfectly comfortable, I avoided ALL caffeine and had very limited amounts of sugar, I allowed myself to "unwind" before bed, I exercised, I prayed about it, I recited Bible verses, listened to quiet music, had white noise, had a fan on me, turned the ceiling fan on, bought black out blinds, talked to my doctor about it, and the list goes on. Oh and forget sleeping away from home. I didn't even have a racing mind. I just could NOT sleep. By the time this had gone on for like five years I was terrified and so stressed to go to bed. I would get in bed and one of two things would happen. One, I would fall asleep right away and wake up an hour later and be awake for three hours or two, I would lay there for hours on end. I would get up and do laundry or read, but nothing ever helped. When I would get utterly exhausted I would just bawl. Dave would wake up and sit with me for hours until I fell asleep. It was mind-numbing. Different treatments were given to me and nothing worked. If I would have known any national security secrets I would have sang like a bird!
I dreaded going to bed and dreaded how tired I would be the next day. I would drag myself up and workout every single day. I would power through the days so tired I wanted to just lay down wherever I was. I battled exhaustion anyway too due to my severe hormonal imbalances. I remember one time at Kroger's I was so tired that I literally wanted to lay down in the aisle. I called my friend whose daughter went to preschool with Eli and asked if she would pick up Eli too because I was too tired to get my groceries in the car and drive over to the school. She assured me it was not a problem. I just drove home in a tired daze.
When I went to Dr. Vliet in August insomnia was number one on my list of symptoms. She was so compassionate and said she can't believe I had lived this way this long. We talked about how God's power flowed through me because I would have given up years ago. He is the reason I have navigated through this journey that I call "hormonal hell." His grace has been sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9). Dr. Vliet had ordered blood work weeks before my appointment so when we got there she had all the results. She pointed to about four hormones that were significantly off all of which cause sleep issues. I wanted to cry just looking at that lab report. I am not casting stones at the other doctors that I have seen over the years. They just saw things differently and treated people differently than Dr. Vliet.
One hormone in general was basically non-existent so she gave me a sample of it that I could use immediately. I stuck that estrogen patch on my hip that night. Guess what? I slept that night...in a hotel room...not in my usual spot...with different sounds...in a different time zone...etc. That was the last day in August and now we are almost through December and I'm still sleeping well. Now I will still have nights that I wake up early or it takes me longer to fall asleep, but it's okay because everybody has those and now I know the next night will be better. The other night I slept eight hours straight. Crazy that is!
So forever I have wanted to share this story, but I didn't want to jinx it. I didn't want to declare what the Lord has done for me because what if the sleep went away. What if I put this blog entry out there for everyone to read and than I stopped sleeping well? Even with Dave, my best pal, or my dad or sister I am hesitant to tell them I slept awesome the night before. Why? Because of fear. I am afraid this gift from God will be ripped from me. I feel unworthy of a simple gift from God.
So right now I am doing what the man did in Luke 8:39. The background on Luke 8:39 is this. The man was demon-possessed. Jesus Christ freed this man from the torment that was his life. The man wanted to go with Jesus on his next mission. Jesus, instead, told him to go and tell everyone what God had done for him. So that's what I am doing by refusing to keep quiet out of fear. God has given me a gift, pure and simple. There are some symptoms from my imbalances that are still present, but sleep has come. I am declaring what God has done for me.
So there. My dear, sweet (and very patient) husband told me a few weeks ago that I needed to do an entry about my sleep. I admitted to him that the Lord had laid on my heart a few weeks before our conversation that He wanted me to do an entry on my sleeping. I put it off, avoided it. When Dave came to me and said this I knew it was what I was supposed to do. So I got right on it two weeks later! I decided today was the day. I hope this entry spoke to your heart in a personal way. Happy New Year!
Monday, December 31, 2012
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Coziness!
Hey everyone! I'm so sorry for the length of time since my last entry. Time flies!
I want to introduce a word to you today...coziness. I do not think it is even a real word, but in my mind it is! Stick with me here. Dave, Eli, and myself traveled to Northwest Ohio for Thanksgiving. Actually we went well before Thanksgiving and were back in Georgia for the actual day. We left Evans, Georgia at about 7:00 p.m. Funny thing is we had to drop off a cupcake order on our way out of town! Eli was all comfy in the back seat. Dare I say cozy?! He had a blanket, his pillow, Floppy, Cheetos (if you give your kid Cheetos in the car please have wipes handy...I learned this the hard way), a water bottle, and his little DVD player with a VeggieTale movie. About 30 minutes into the trip he asks how much longer! We said, "well Eli, only 11 more hours!" He fell asleep about two hours later and slept most of the trip. We made it to Dave's parent's house the next morning. We were thankful to God that He allowed us to arrive safely.
Going back to Ohio is a tough thing for me. Don't get me wrong I LOVE seeing my family. I knew that I would get to see all my little nieces and nephews and that I would get to hang out with my awesome sister-in-laws, Amanda and Rachel. It is a rare thing that all the Limbirds get to be together. I also could not wait to see my dad! My sister and I had plans to enjoy each other's company one afternoon and they could all not wait to see Eli. I was hoping to get to see my Aunt MiChelle and her kids, Alyssa and Kaiden. My sister also has a wonderful boyfriend who has children and we all enjoy our time together. My point in telling you all of this is that there are many, many aspects of traveling to Ohio that are very good. I am not going to lie though. It's hard. It makes me miss my mom and I struggle with thoughts over the last few times I was in Ohio before she passed on to her heavenly reward. She also would cook up a storm for Thanksgiving making the best turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, corn casserole, and apple pie you have ever had. If you have ever been to my parent's house you know it's cozy and inviting. My mom had a God-given knack for decorating and art. She painted beautiful pictures and just put her fingerprint on any room she decorated. Even now when you enter that house you feel her presence in all the creativity around you. When I walk in and feel that presence it usually makes me sad because it makes me realize once again that she is no longer there.
So as we traveled from Dave's parent's house to my childhood home (only about a 15 minute drive) the first evening I felt that usual sickness in the pit of my stomach. I just knew that I would walk in and be smacked with the concept of her absence. Something different happened this time though...I walked in and I felt a tremendous coziness. My mom LOVED being cozy. She could make everything cozy. Every room in the house is cozy. Even her huge Fifth Wheel camper was cozy! I remember one March at a very cold horse show she and I camped on the show grounds. I had been riding my horse one cold evening and when I came back to the camper with freezing fingers and toes she had prepared hot chocolate and had the fireplace going (yes her camper had a fireplace).
Coziness is hard to explain. The dictionary says cozy means, "to be snugly warm and comfortable." Mom took her role as a homemaker very seriously. She painstakingly made that house a home. She had a gift of taking something mundane and turning it into something special. Even a trip to Wal-Mart with her would be all kinds of fun. When I was a kid I couldn't wait to get home after school because I knew she would be there and would have time for me...and a wonderful snack (often times fresh chocolate chip cookies). I firmly believe she had many gifts from God. One gift was to make small things special. She had the gift of creativity and God clearly gave her the ability to make a house a home.
As Dave, Eli, and I approached the door I could smell the wood burning fireplace burning. One chore I had as an adolescent was to take the cut wood from the barn and dump it through the open basement window for the furnace. I never understood how people changed the thermostat without first "firing up" the furnace! Anyway, my dad was sitting in a leather chair with his feet propped up in front of the fireplace. I looked around and felt a huge hug from my mom. I still missed her tremendously and cried a few times while I was there, but realized what a gift she had and how she passed it on to me.
Dave and I are cozy people. One of our favorite places to go every fall is the north Georgia mountains and stay in a wonderfully cozy cabin. We are a comfy pant, fireplace, and chill weather kind of family. When Eli gets home from school the first thing he wants to do is get cozy which means to put on his jammies. This occurs on the days he does not wear his dragon costume! He likes being "cozy to the coze!" In the summer when it's 8,000 degrees outside I want the air conditioning turned way down so I can still be cozy! I believe my mom taught me to put a priority on making our house a home, to make it inviting, and to make it feel safe.
Being at home I realized that she dedicated her life to her family and home. She was a big personality and left an incredible imprint on that house. Being home I became so thankful that I knew her and that she took the time to teach me such important lessons. I am so grateful that God put in me that same creative gene. While I was there I did a great deal of cooking and baking which is also a trait I got from my mom. I got out her big pot and made her chili recipe. As it simmered I sat at her kitchen table and missed her like crazy, but also felt grateful that she taught me to be a homemaker and mom. She taught me how fantastic it is to be COZY!
The following verse is one that reminds me of my mom. This blog entry isn't based on a Bible study this time, but just thoughts on our trip to Ohio. I hope you enjoyed it and the Lord spoke to you in a personal way.
Proverbs 31:10 An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.
I want to introduce a word to you today...coziness. I do not think it is even a real word, but in my mind it is! Stick with me here. Dave, Eli, and myself traveled to Northwest Ohio for Thanksgiving. Actually we went well before Thanksgiving and were back in Georgia for the actual day. We left Evans, Georgia at about 7:00 p.m. Funny thing is we had to drop off a cupcake order on our way out of town! Eli was all comfy in the back seat. Dare I say cozy?! He had a blanket, his pillow, Floppy, Cheetos (if you give your kid Cheetos in the car please have wipes handy...I learned this the hard way), a water bottle, and his little DVD player with a VeggieTale movie. About 30 minutes into the trip he asks how much longer! We said, "well Eli, only 11 more hours!" He fell asleep about two hours later and slept most of the trip. We made it to Dave's parent's house the next morning. We were thankful to God that He allowed us to arrive safely.
Going back to Ohio is a tough thing for me. Don't get me wrong I LOVE seeing my family. I knew that I would get to see all my little nieces and nephews and that I would get to hang out with my awesome sister-in-laws, Amanda and Rachel. It is a rare thing that all the Limbirds get to be together. I also could not wait to see my dad! My sister and I had plans to enjoy each other's company one afternoon and they could all not wait to see Eli. I was hoping to get to see my Aunt MiChelle and her kids, Alyssa and Kaiden. My sister also has a wonderful boyfriend who has children and we all enjoy our time together. My point in telling you all of this is that there are many, many aspects of traveling to Ohio that are very good. I am not going to lie though. It's hard. It makes me miss my mom and I struggle with thoughts over the last few times I was in Ohio before she passed on to her heavenly reward. She also would cook up a storm for Thanksgiving making the best turkey, stuffing, sweet potatoes, corn casserole, and apple pie you have ever had. If you have ever been to my parent's house you know it's cozy and inviting. My mom had a God-given knack for decorating and art. She painted beautiful pictures and just put her fingerprint on any room she decorated. Even now when you enter that house you feel her presence in all the creativity around you. When I walk in and feel that presence it usually makes me sad because it makes me realize once again that she is no longer there.
So as we traveled from Dave's parent's house to my childhood home (only about a 15 minute drive) the first evening I felt that usual sickness in the pit of my stomach. I just knew that I would walk in and be smacked with the concept of her absence. Something different happened this time though...I walked in and I felt a tremendous coziness. My mom LOVED being cozy. She could make everything cozy. Every room in the house is cozy. Even her huge Fifth Wheel camper was cozy! I remember one March at a very cold horse show she and I camped on the show grounds. I had been riding my horse one cold evening and when I came back to the camper with freezing fingers and toes she had prepared hot chocolate and had the fireplace going (yes her camper had a fireplace).
Coziness is hard to explain. The dictionary says cozy means, "to be snugly warm and comfortable." Mom took her role as a homemaker very seriously. She painstakingly made that house a home. She had a gift of taking something mundane and turning it into something special. Even a trip to Wal-Mart with her would be all kinds of fun. When I was a kid I couldn't wait to get home after school because I knew she would be there and would have time for me...and a wonderful snack (often times fresh chocolate chip cookies). I firmly believe she had many gifts from God. One gift was to make small things special. She had the gift of creativity and God clearly gave her the ability to make a house a home.
As Dave, Eli, and I approached the door I could smell the wood burning fireplace burning. One chore I had as an adolescent was to take the cut wood from the barn and dump it through the open basement window for the furnace. I never understood how people changed the thermostat without first "firing up" the furnace! Anyway, my dad was sitting in a leather chair with his feet propped up in front of the fireplace. I looked around and felt a huge hug from my mom. I still missed her tremendously and cried a few times while I was there, but realized what a gift she had and how she passed it on to me.
Dave and I are cozy people. One of our favorite places to go every fall is the north Georgia mountains and stay in a wonderfully cozy cabin. We are a comfy pant, fireplace, and chill weather kind of family. When Eli gets home from school the first thing he wants to do is get cozy which means to put on his jammies. This occurs on the days he does not wear his dragon costume! He likes being "cozy to the coze!" In the summer when it's 8,000 degrees outside I want the air conditioning turned way down so I can still be cozy! I believe my mom taught me to put a priority on making our house a home, to make it inviting, and to make it feel safe.
Being at home I realized that she dedicated her life to her family and home. She was a big personality and left an incredible imprint on that house. Being home I became so thankful that I knew her and that she took the time to teach me such important lessons. I am so grateful that God put in me that same creative gene. While I was there I did a great deal of cooking and baking which is also a trait I got from my mom. I got out her big pot and made her chili recipe. As it simmered I sat at her kitchen table and missed her like crazy, but also felt grateful that she taught me to be a homemaker and mom. She taught me how fantastic it is to be COZY!
The following verse is one that reminds me of my mom. This blog entry isn't based on a Bible study this time, but just thoughts on our trip to Ohio. I hope you enjoyed it and the Lord spoke to you in a personal way.
Proverbs 31:10 An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)